Iād better put my earrings on, you never know.āSophie Divry, The library of unrequited love. Highlighted
Unsatisfied desire allows us to imagine we have found the one who will make us whole, because we havenāt yet tested the fit. The not yet relationship becomes strangely comfortable, at least compared to the risk of finding out your belovedās half-self wonāt conform to your own.āLisa A. Phillips, Unrequited. Highlighted
We canāt choose whose wreckage can [change the parts of ourselves and our worlds we canāt]. We all start as strangers, but we forget that we rarely choose who ends up a stranger, too.āBrianna Wiest, 101 Essays That Will Change The Way You Think. Highlighted
We find people irrationally compelling. We find souls made of the same stuff ours are.āBrianna Wiest, 101 Essays That Will Change The Way You Think. Highlighted
āThe seeker has a confirmation bias, looking for positive signs and discounting the negative ones,ā Baumeister said. āIf thereās ambivalence, itās going to prolong the hope, because there are enough positives to seize on and overinterpret. The negatives you can brush aside.āāLisa A. Phillips, Unrequited. Highlighted
When weāre caught up in unsatisfied desire, we can write the story of our love ... This is fundamentally a creative act, often full of pleasure at first ... yet being together means facing reality, which will probably fall short of the self-centered fantasy.āLisa A. Phillips, Unrequited. Highlighted
I used to think the only way a man could hurt you was by lashing out, but it turns out the absence of action can cause just as much pain.āHazel Hayes, Out of Love. Highlighted
But, you know, that feeling? When you wake up in the morning and you have somebody to think about? Somewhere for hope to go? Even when itās bad, itās good.āCasey McQuiston, One Last Stop. Highlighted
had I not been struck by the upside-down image of my frilly ankle socks, once white, now turning bright red. Like a cartoon animal who doesnāt fall until they notice that the ground is gone, the sight of my own blood made me suddenly aware of the searing pain in my heels. I tore off my shiny black shoes and peeled the blood-soaked socks from my feet before righting myself and continuing my search barefoot.āHazel Hayes, Better by Far. Highlighted
And look, I know how this goes. I know that by the time you get married Iāll have healed enough that I can smile for you too. But this foresight barely makes a dent in the agony of imagining it now. Somehow, each fresh loss feels different, like a maze with shifting walls; I know thereās a way out, but Iām fucked if I can find it.āHazel Hayes, Better by Far. Highlighted
If you have feelings for someone, and you donāt let that person know, youāre lying with your silence. Be direct. It saves so much trouble and regret.āDerek Sivers, How to Live. Highlighted
Projecting perfection onto someone is not love. You say āI love youā but really mean āI love thisā.āDerek Sivers, How to Live. Highlighted